Poetics on the Bus

The morning air is cold – almost freezing – against my face. I can feel my beard crystallize with every breath. It’s dark out, I can see the first rays of sunshine start to peek over the downtown landscape.

I stomp my feet to stay warm and shove my hands in my pockets. It takes a while, but the bus comes. Finally. It’s late, like always.

I unzip my coat and step on, shuffle to the back. As we get closer to downtown the bus fills up. First, it’s standing room only but as the big concrete buildings of downtown get closer, personal space becomes nothing more than a fond dream.

Then the smell hits me. It’s foul, acrid and lingering. I look around. Other faces are either twisted in disgust, like mine, or indifferent.

One stands out from the rest. The feigned indifference stands out like a pimple on prom night.


What did you eat? Rotten cheese and nutter butters? Spoiled meat? A breakfast burrito? Dear god people! Doesn’t he know that farting on a bus is like farting in an elevator?

I wish I could say that it was the first time, but a bus is a smelly place to be. It’s usually better in the wintertime, since everyone is wearing an extra 10 lbs of clothing which helps to *ahem* keep everything in. Most of the time.

In the summertime you can open a window, I guess. That’s not an option when it’s -30 out. It may have been no more than 10 minutes, but it felt much longer.


What did we learn this week?

  1. Don’t be that guy
  2. DON’T be that guy
  3. Look, I get it, we’re all human, we all do it. But DON’T BE THAT GUY

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In Other News

This week I carved out the time to review a bunch of links that my friend Carl had sent to me. The subject sets the tone for the email: Visit these links and do it but don’t read this till you can actually allocate time to actually visit the links!

That was verbatim, by the way. I laughed when I read it because that’s just so me. I love soaking up information, but I don’t always have the discipline to stay on the same subject for long enough to be effective.

I mean, when I was in school I would go to Wikipedia to research something and I’d end up going down a rabbit hole. Like, how do you go from researching The Enlightenment to reading about Pterodactyls and how they wouldn’t be able to fly today because the air isn’t as oxygen-rich as it was a few million years ago.

Carl knew that if he didn’t call me out on it I would open it, make a mental note to go back to it when I found a spare moment, and never go back. Not because I don’t see the value in going to the links, but because that’s how my scatterbrain works.

So it took some time, but I got back to it. And what I found were some valuable local resources that could help me on my journey to bestselling novel fame. And most of the resources could be used at no cost to me.

So that’s got me to thinking: why don’t I take advantage of this kind of stuff more often? Nothing was stopping me from going and researching all of that stuff myself. But I didn’t. Didn’t even occur to me. I remember eight or so years ago when I first started working on Fade to Black, the novel which I brought to NYC to sell.

I thought it was SO good back then. Now, looking back, I couldn’t believe how juvenile my writing seemed back then. Writing isn’t something that you just have, after all. It’s a talent, and like every talent, you need to refine it with practice and coaching and criticism and experience.

My biggest takeaway is that I need to realize that I’m not good enough, not yet. I need to reach out to people who are more seasoned in the craft than me and be deliberate about it.

What’s stopping me from applying for Manitoba writer’s awards? Or from sending my manuscript to the writer in residence for the Winnipeg Public Library? I think the biggest question I have for myself is:

Do I want this, or not?


What else did we learn this week?

4. Winnipeg is cold. The air hurts my face. Why do I live in a place where the air hurts my face?

5. If I needed more incentive to apply (I don’t), the winners of some of these book awards get a couple grand in cash. Cashish. Cold hard currency. I would like that, too.

Later days,



Let’s talk about the past. And about the future.

If 2018 was the year of reset buttons, then 2019 has been the year of new beginnings. Most people fear change. It’s scary, it’s unknown and it gives you that feeling of anxiety in the pit of your stomach.

I think that change is a good thing. I mean, nothing lasts forever, so maybe the conversation shouldn’t be “how can I keep things the same?” because that conversation is one of fear and playing small and not living up to your potential.

Things change, and that sucks. Someone that you were close with becomes an acquaintance or less. Somebody who you barely knew becomes close. These are things that we cannot always change. Some people are only meant to stay in your life for a little bit.

It’s not about keeping things the same. It’s about growing intentionally with like-minded people.

A few weekends ago I was asked to speak at the #Change1 self-development conference. It was a unique opportunity for me because it forced me to think critically about the past few years of my life.

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I spoke about what it meant to me to pursue my passion – publishing a book. As I prepped for my discussion I thought back on my crazy journey. It STILL seems surreal to me. I left a job where I was happy for the chance to do something different.

Just a chance, nothing more. Nothing was guaranteed, and I knew that I would have to work for every little thing which I earned.

I took that chance because my entire life I had played it safe. Played small. And here’s the thing – you can’t do things that people will remember by playing small. You’ve got to take chances – hoist the black flag and slit some throats if necessary. That’s scary. Terrifying, really.

Big risk, big reward. I wouldn’t have gotten the opportunities that I did if I hadn’t left my job. I wouldn’t have met the people I have, most likely.

Pursuing your passion means taking some risks. You often have to jump in with both feet, even if you haven’t tested the waters yet.

It was great having the opportunity to share my story at #Change1. Ya gotta push yourself out of that comfort zone, people! Looking back made me start thinking about what the future looks like.

Do you live your life on purpose? For me, that’s an important concept. How else can you work towards the life that you want if you don’t give a thought about what that looks like? I don’t mean things like hoping you win the lottery. If you do, good on you! Most of us won’t in our lifetimes.

I probably never will again. I tapped that out WAY too early when I won on that scratch ticket after I turned eighteen. But I can hope! I could use twenty-six million dollars, how about you? Heck, I’d be good with winning the Kinsmen Jackpot bingo pot.

Most of the time we have vague ideas about what we want the future to look like. It’s things like “I want to buy a house,” or “I want to have a winter home in the Caribbean.” But most people aren’t deliberate about it.

Live your life on purpose. 5 years from now, on a Tuesday, what does your life look like? Who are you with? What are you doing? Where do you live? Be as detailed as possible about what it all looks like, then ask yourself why. Why do you want the big house with the dog and the white picket fence? Why is that something that is important to you?

Does that speak to your values or the mark that you want to leave on the world?

For context, I don’t do New Year’s resolutions. If there’s something about me that I want to change, I’m not waiting until January 1. But I love the concept of goal setting, of intentional, achievable targets.

Five years from now there are a few things which I’d like to do:

  1. I’d like to visit a new continent. I’ve been to Europe, and I’ve been to North America (obviously). There has GOT to be a story or two in me that could be uncovered by visiting a completely foreign place
  2. I’d like to be traditionally published. 2020 for me is going to be about continuing to improve in my craft. That means I need to keep writing. It may sound strange, but I can see the threads in front of me. I know that I can do better than my first two efforts. I have a story, I just don’t know what that means yet.
  3. Stretch goal! I want a bestseller on the New York Times bestseller list.

These are my writing goals over the next five years. More immediately, I need to find an agent. New York could still help me accomplish that – I’ve heard back from one of the agents who requested material. It was a no from that person, but that’s okay. I still have six strong, viable options.

At this time it’s been just over three months. I think it’s time to poke them, don’t you? Sound off in the comments over whether or not you think I should reach out to them.


What did we learn this week?

  1. A lot can happen in a year. Much more can happen in 5.
  2. It’s been over a year since I dropped my keys down an elevator shaft. I still clutch them extra tight whenever I step into one.
  3. Since I’ve been doing Christmas shopping a lot this week, I’ve been thinking about how fortunate I am. There’s nothing that I NEED. I think I need to remember that more.
  4. Wine tastes best when it comes in a box. You might disagree, but you’re wrong and I hate you (not really, but you ARE wrong).
  5. Sometimes at the end of serious posts, I try to lighten the mood. What other way than with bad jokes, right? Probably to have people leave on a good note! So… you’re welcome!
  6. You should totally buy Far from Ordinary if you haven’t already. Even if you have! It makes for a GREAT Christmas gift.

Also, I haven’t heard anything from the camp of Imposter Murray. I assume that he is cringing in his Christmas boots.

Later days,


What’s in a Name?

Hi! How are you doing?

Michael here, coming at you live from Winnerpeg! Okay, maybe not live, this is a BLOG post, after all. I’m still riding the high from my hometown Winnipeg Blue Bombers winning the Grey Cup on Sunday.

If you are tuning in from the States, or elsewhere, the Grey Cup is like the Canadian version of the Superbowl. It had been 29 long years since the Bombers won. That makes it a pretty big deal.

I could probably write an entire blog post talking about the Bombers. I’ve witnessed a lot more heartbreak than triumph over the years, watching them choke at the wrong moments, or even how nervous I felt with the nail-biting victory over our arch-rivals, the Saskatchewan Rough Riders, last Sunday.

But believe me, you wouldn’t want that. I’m going to stick to what I know best so that I can give you a semi-funny, mostly coherent rant about something related to the world of being a published author. It’s what the people want! That, and more post making fun of my sister.

You see, I learned the other day that there is another Michael Murray out there in Authorland.

No, I don’t mean hunky former teen heartthrob Chad Michael Murray, though the resemblance between the two of us is uncanny.


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It’s like I’m looking into a mirror


There is another Michael Murray out there. This is important because, as you undoubtedly know, authors subscribe to the Highlander school of thought around these kinds of things.

There can be only one!

This other Michael Murray – we’ll call him Imposter Murray – has been writing for a long time, from the looks of it. His first writing credit came all the way back in 1989, the year after I was born. There are two likely situations here.

The first is that I’ve been doing a Fight Club Tyler Durden/The Narrator kind of thing, writing as Imposter Murray in my sleep, since I was 12 months old. This seems like the most likely scenario since I was an incredibly fast learner. Erm, so I was told.

The second is that Imposter Murray took a trip to Winnipeg and somehow happened to see my name. Understandably awed and taken aback by the perfect alliteration, he stole it and has been using it ever since to write made-for-TV Christmas movies


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So many Christmas movies


I’m sure if we tune to the Hallmark channel for long enough this Holiday season, we’ll find one of his cinematic masterpieces.

One of the questions that I get the most is about my pen name. Why do I write under the name M. James Murray? When I chose it, I had no idea that Michael J. Murray AKA Imposter Murray existed. I did know about the existence of Chad Michael Murray, but that wasn’t the reason, either.

It was all about the findability factor. Findability. That’s a word now, by the way. Verb. Ability to be found, notably concerning online presence.


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Shakespeare invented over 1700 words. Surely I can invent at least one!

*Editors Note* apparently findability IS a word. Which brings my invented word count back down to zero.

When I google my birth name, I’m not on the first page of results. Or the second. Or the third. Or the fourth. I think you get the idea. Also, no judging for googling my name! You’ve done it too, I’d bet!

There are Michael Murrays (is the plural Murrai?) who are doctors. One of us is an accomplished organist. I assume this means that he is proficient at playing, not harvesting organs.

There is a Michael Murray who produces video games, and we already talked about the two other MM’s in the Hollywood world.

So I needed a somewhat unique, distinguishable name. It was important to me that I stayed true to myself, so a pen name was out of the question. Somewhere along the line, I got the idea to use my middle name. And it stuck.

It’s catchy, it flows off the tongue. And when you google it, BAM!


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I’ve got a Google panel, guys!

The first thing that pops up is my twitter account. The second is a link to Far from Ordinary. Then a link to my website. Findability, BAY BAY!

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a Christmas movie to write.

So, what did we learn this week?

  1. To thine own self, stay true. Thanks, Polonius.
  2. I missed the anniversary of this blog! It happened back in October, actually. I guess I should eat some cake or something.
  3. My god, I’m sore! My knee hurts so badly that it’s tough to put weight on it. There’s no injury, I’m just over thirty. Pretty sure my knees get sore when I just LOOK at a treadmill nowadays.
  4. I got twenty-two downloads from my free book giveaway! If even one of those downloads leads to a review, I’m golden. Reviews are the lifeblood that keeps my book relevant to Amazon and, therefore, to any potential readers.
  5. This weekend I’ll be speaking at the #Change1 conference. Check it out. I’ll be talking about following your passion. Get tickets here.

Later days,